The high road is chock full of pot holes.
Much to my dismay, my attempt at making peace failed. Looks like it's going to be Christmas in Vancouver. The magical upside is that I'm spending Christmas with my big brother, his wife, her mother, and my funny niece. It's going to be a very laid-back casual Christmas, and for that, I'm exceptionally grateful. The crab-man and I enjoy a good road trip, so I'm hoping the snow stays away so we can actually enjoy the ride :) Portland for Christmas...yep, that sounds alright to me!
Sounds like New Year's will be in Spokane - which is magic. Lucky for me, my pal (whose birthday is NYE) and I are going to have a classy, relaxed evening all to ourselves. New Year's Day, I'll get to see some of my favorite Spokane peeps - and perhaps I'll even get to exchange gifts with my parents and other brother & his wife. We'll see...I can't get my hopes up too much; the suckerpunch I got yesterday knocked the wind out of me and I'm still a little tender about the emotional ribcage.
In good news, my workpal and I are planning on boosting up our creative sales. So, it's to the blog & etsy I go for fresh inspiration and marketing tips. I'm actually really excited about doing more with my photos...I need something creative and fun to focus on for a while, so I'm super happy to have a pal to go through this with.
Things aren't fantastically magical right now...but it dawned on me today - crap hits you in three's...and so now, I've GOT to be done! Whew :) In the "Mary vs Singleness" world, I got back on the saddle...if anything worth talking about comes of it - I'll write about it!
God Bless you!
M
Thursday, December 16, 2010
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Auld Lang Syne
I think the end of each year can come to one of two conclusions: 1) you are revived and ready to conquer the next year, 2) you are completely exhausted and ready to sleep the next year off.
I've wound up at the second option. (I'd say that I ended up with number two, but the entendre was too much for me.)
I had an awful run-in with my mom last Friday. I had a realization about her that shook me to my very core, and I'm still not quite over it. Saturday evening, I realized that someone who I knew and understood to be a certain way was absolutely not. I sincerely cared about this person, was extremely happy to spend time with this person, and it's over. I'm not sure if that one evening was the off night, or it was true colors being exposed for the first time. Either way, it was hurtful and agonizing. I've kind of felt it coming to an end for a while now, but I didn't want it. I still don't want it to be over - but if it's for the best, if it's what God has for me - then I'm ultimately ok with it. I've had another situation biting me in the face for the last few weeks and it came to a head today. I'll say this - all of the running I've done this year, all of the preparation, the stretching, the exercising - it's not really prepared me for ALWAYS having to take the high road. I'm completely exhausted. I was so upset Sunday morning that I actually RAN to church. Yep. You read that right.
I guess blogs are a kind of online diary. So I'd rather be real and just let it out - but I want to be clear - I'm not asking for help. I'm not seeking pity or looking for someone to reach in and save me. I'm exhausted. As a Christian, my faith and my hope are in Christ. I'd be lying if I didn't admit to being let down. I'll admit to taking some fairly stupid steps in the last few months, but at the heart of me, I want what God has for me. I want His will and His perfect time. I don't understand His time; lately, I don't really like it. If you would've told me 20 years ago that I'd still be single and childless, and only 2 months from being 35...I would not have believed you. I wouldn't have believed that God would have that in store for me. I'm trying to hard to be grateful. So many people are without jobs, without food or a roof over their head - and here I am, being achey and exhausted. A coworker found out last night that her husband has cancer and my heart aches for her...I am NOT dealing with anything that awful, but yet this exhausted achiness from a heart that waits and waits and doesn't quite understand why - keeps agonizing over endless thoughts of what is wrong with me, what on earth must be so bad that no one wants to be with me. I know, it sounds pathetic. But it's real. I just feel uber silly for feeling this way when people have REAL problems.
I'm not sure what's ahead. I may very well end up working to complete my master's this year...and then again, maybe not. I want out of here - this city, the state, perhaps the country. Every now and again in my life I'd have the urge to run...and I've been training.
I have great hope for next year - I conquered more this year than I would've ever thought possible. It's been kind of amazing watching myself go through the last twelve months. It's been surreal and surprising. I've been scared out of my mind, more tired than I could possibly imagine, more proud of myself than ever before, and I've never been more ready for something BIG to happen.
I hope if you read this - you have an amazing new year. I realize I don't sound like the best example of a hopeful Christian right now, and I am sorry for that. Things will get better, my hope will get stronger, and God WILL make a way - where there seems to be no way. I know, because He's proven it time and time before.
I've wound up at the second option. (I'd say that I ended up with number two, but the entendre was too much for me.)
I had an awful run-in with my mom last Friday. I had a realization about her that shook me to my very core, and I'm still not quite over it. Saturday evening, I realized that someone who I knew and understood to be a certain way was absolutely not. I sincerely cared about this person, was extremely happy to spend time with this person, and it's over. I'm not sure if that one evening was the off night, or it was true colors being exposed for the first time. Either way, it was hurtful and agonizing. I've kind of felt it coming to an end for a while now, but I didn't want it. I still don't want it to be over - but if it's for the best, if it's what God has for me - then I'm ultimately ok with it. I've had another situation biting me in the face for the last few weeks and it came to a head today. I'll say this - all of the running I've done this year, all of the preparation, the stretching, the exercising - it's not really prepared me for ALWAYS having to take the high road. I'm completely exhausted. I was so upset Sunday morning that I actually RAN to church. Yep. You read that right.
I guess blogs are a kind of online diary. So I'd rather be real and just let it out - but I want to be clear - I'm not asking for help. I'm not seeking pity or looking for someone to reach in and save me. I'm exhausted. As a Christian, my faith and my hope are in Christ. I'd be lying if I didn't admit to being let down. I'll admit to taking some fairly stupid steps in the last few months, but at the heart of me, I want what God has for me. I want His will and His perfect time. I don't understand His time; lately, I don't really like it. If you would've told me 20 years ago that I'd still be single and childless, and only 2 months from being 35...I would not have believed you. I wouldn't have believed that God would have that in store for me. I'm trying to hard to be grateful. So many people are without jobs, without food or a roof over their head - and here I am, being achey and exhausted. A coworker found out last night that her husband has cancer and my heart aches for her...I am NOT dealing with anything that awful, but yet this exhausted achiness from a heart that waits and waits and doesn't quite understand why - keeps agonizing over endless thoughts of what is wrong with me, what on earth must be so bad that no one wants to be with me. I know, it sounds pathetic. But it's real. I just feel uber silly for feeling this way when people have REAL problems.
I'm not sure what's ahead. I may very well end up working to complete my master's this year...and then again, maybe not. I want out of here - this city, the state, perhaps the country. Every now and again in my life I'd have the urge to run...and I've been training.
I have great hope for next year - I conquered more this year than I would've ever thought possible. It's been kind of amazing watching myself go through the last twelve months. It's been surreal and surprising. I've been scared out of my mind, more tired than I could possibly imagine, more proud of myself than ever before, and I've never been more ready for something BIG to happen.
I hope if you read this - you have an amazing new year. I realize I don't sound like the best example of a hopeful Christian right now, and I am sorry for that. Things will get better, my hope will get stronger, and God WILL make a way - where there seems to be no way. I know, because He's proven it time and time before.
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Finish Line
After a year of training, I did it. I finished the Seattle Half Marathon. I finished on a wing and a prayer. Battled a chest cold, asthma, and an excruciatingly painful leg...and finished. I finished alone. While others were surrounded by family, friends, and loved ones at the finish line, I stood alone. I don't want sympathy or pity, it just is what it is. And the harsh truth is, I didn't much care for it. This amazing pride of finishing what I'd set out to accomplish, this feeling of relief that I completed a half marathon even though every physical part of my being wanted to quit, were kind of shadowed by this tremendous "ugh".
I think a lot of people get a little blah-ish at the holidays. What should be a time of joyous celebration is weighed down by the guilt to have to shop until you wind up in debt. The billowy mounds of snow should be inviting like they were when we were kids, but rather, they are evil white demons creating havoc on the roads and causing horrible car accidents and great physical damage.
I'm so grateful to have kicked my New Year's Resolution in the tookas. I'm grateful that my lungs are stronger than they ever have been, and I'm so extremely glad to have a medal that shows just how hard I've worked.
I'm ready for a move. I'm ready for a big change. I remember a poem I wrote in my early twenties about how badly I wanted something to change in my life, how I felt like I was drowning in stagnant water...and that feeling is rearing it's ugly head again. I can rest in the knowledge that God has me in the palm of His hand, I just wouldn't be human if I didn't admit that all of this waiting has left me exhausted and achey.
2010 was a good year for the health of the girl that I am. I'm stronger than I knew I could be, I fought my way through races I never thought I'd take part in. I've stood up for myself, been proud of myself, and fought for myself. And yet, the girl who started this year wanting a very specific thing is still there, waiting. I have great hope that 2011 will bring great joy and many more opportunities for greater health and a well-deserved pride.
I think a lot of people get a little blah-ish at the holidays. What should be a time of joyous celebration is weighed down by the guilt to have to shop until you wind up in debt. The billowy mounds of snow should be inviting like they were when we were kids, but rather, they are evil white demons creating havoc on the roads and causing horrible car accidents and great physical damage.
I'm so grateful to have kicked my New Year's Resolution in the tookas. I'm grateful that my lungs are stronger than they ever have been, and I'm so extremely glad to have a medal that shows just how hard I've worked.
I'm ready for a move. I'm ready for a big change. I remember a poem I wrote in my early twenties about how badly I wanted something to change in my life, how I felt like I was drowning in stagnant water...and that feeling is rearing it's ugly head again. I can rest in the knowledge that God has me in the palm of His hand, I just wouldn't be human if I didn't admit that all of this waiting has left me exhausted and achey.
2010 was a good year for the health of the girl that I am. I'm stronger than I knew I could be, I fought my way through races I never thought I'd take part in. I've stood up for myself, been proud of myself, and fought for myself. And yet, the girl who started this year wanting a very specific thing is still there, waiting. I have great hope that 2011 will bring great joy and many more opportunities for greater health and a well-deserved pride.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
Distractions...
The last part of August brought a pretty happy change for me - and September was amazing (ya know, UH-MAZE-ING). Nothing serious, just an intimidatingly smart, funny, handsome distraction. No idea what is going to come of it - but I've had more fun in the last 30+ days than I have in a decade, and THAT is saying something. (I'm a fun girl, what can I say?)
I'm spending more time on me, too. I've ran more miles this week than I ever have before. Each day I've been aiming for 5 miles - which isn't much to REAL runners, but for me, it's so much more than I would've ever thought possible on a daily basis. Today, I splurged and got a Road ID bracelet and yesterday, I got a new race-day shirt. Tonight - I'm heading to the runner's store to get some new kicks. Along with my new brace, I'm hoping the shoes make my feet and knee feel new again.
This Sunday, I participate in a 10k in Spokane...yep, running a 10 on 10/10/10! On the 23rd, I've got another 5k, followed by a 10 mile race in November - and the grand finale - the reason I started running - the Seattle Half Marathon is on Sunday, November 28th. There's the notion that my finish line could have company - and that would be fantastic.
I'm so happy and relieved to be feeling renewed and refreshed - I am laughing so much and smiling so much lately - I just want to soak it in. It could last another week or longer, I'm just going to enjoy what I can while I have it. I was raised to not be selfish - to put others first, but I'm gonna go ahead and say it - this time is for me. I deserve to be carefree and laidback, and I'm SO grateful that it's happening now. I'm a really happy girl. And in case the distraction ever happens upon this - many, many thanks for reminding me what this feels like.
I'm spending more time on me, too. I've ran more miles this week than I ever have before. Each day I've been aiming for 5 miles - which isn't much to REAL runners, but for me, it's so much more than I would've ever thought possible on a daily basis. Today, I splurged and got a Road ID bracelet and yesterday, I got a new race-day shirt. Tonight - I'm heading to the runner's store to get some new kicks. Along with my new brace, I'm hoping the shoes make my feet and knee feel new again.
This Sunday, I participate in a 10k in Spokane...yep, running a 10 on 10/10/10! On the 23rd, I've got another 5k, followed by a 10 mile race in November - and the grand finale - the reason I started running - the Seattle Half Marathon is on Sunday, November 28th. There's the notion that my finish line could have company - and that would be fantastic.
I'm so happy and relieved to be feeling renewed and refreshed - I am laughing so much and smiling so much lately - I just want to soak it in. It could last another week or longer, I'm just going to enjoy what I can while I have it. I was raised to not be selfish - to put others first, but I'm gonna go ahead and say it - this time is for me. I deserve to be carefree and laidback, and I'm SO grateful that it's happening now. I'm a really happy girl. And in case the distraction ever happens upon this - many, many thanks for reminding me what this feels like.
Monday, October 4, 2010
Fell off the planet...
Eeyikes! It's been MONTHS since I wrote!
Let's see...I finished a 5k, which turned into a 10k, I went to St Louis for the Joyce Meyer Women's Convention, and I RAPPELED DOWN A 514FT BUILDING! It has been sheer madness over the last few months.
The rappel was sheer insanity. I really wasn't that scared, until I was about 20 feet down. The step over the edge wasn't so bad, the first 10 feet weren't so bad, but in 90 degree heat on a metal facade at 4pm in direct sunlight, the next 490+ feet were a bit of a challenge. The majority of the rappelers meant to walk down the side of the building, with the assurance that your feet would be in contact with the building for the majority of the rappel. That, however, didn't happen. The wall was too hot, and no matter how hard you tried, your feet couldn't stay on the surface - good traction or not. I made it down in about 11 minutes, mostly due to the strength of my arms. I'll admit that for a few moments, the sweet Lord and I had to have a couple of pep talks. The height of the building wasn't the problem, it was the knowledge that should my arms wear out, I could potentially spend HOURS on the building, just hanging there - either waiting to be saved or to be humiliatingly lowered down. So naturally, I prayed some more and got the heck down all by myself. Immediately I thought, "I am NEVER doing that again." And now, 2 months later - I would COMPLETELY do it again. I know, I'm crazy.
I completed the Alki Beach 5k...I just didn't do it the way it was intended. It ended up being 5k just to get to the starting line, so a few others (who were from out of town and also misinformed) and I walked the 10k together. I have no idea what my finish time was, but it was a beautiful day and I was glad to finish.
The JMM conference in St. Louis was fantastic as always. Lots of fantastic info on mind, mouth, moods, and attitudes. All very helpful and encouraging. Darlene Zschech led worship - it was amazing. All in all, a fantastic trip - lots of fun volunteering - just not much rest! I met a super fun lady from Idaho, she and I shared a few meals and laughs. I'm always thrilled to meet someone new, especially if we've had such different life experiences.
I can't believe it's October!!! I'll definitely try to write more tomorrow.
God Bless!
M
Let's see...I finished a 5k, which turned into a 10k, I went to St Louis for the Joyce Meyer Women's Convention, and I RAPPELED DOWN A 514FT BUILDING! It has been sheer madness over the last few months.
The rappel was sheer insanity. I really wasn't that scared, until I was about 20 feet down. The step over the edge wasn't so bad, the first 10 feet weren't so bad, but in 90 degree heat on a metal facade at 4pm in direct sunlight, the next 490+ feet were a bit of a challenge. The majority of the rappelers meant to walk down the side of the building, with the assurance that your feet would be in contact with the building for the majority of the rappel. That, however, didn't happen. The wall was too hot, and no matter how hard you tried, your feet couldn't stay on the surface - good traction or not. I made it down in about 11 minutes, mostly due to the strength of my arms. I'll admit that for a few moments, the sweet Lord and I had to have a couple of pep talks. The height of the building wasn't the problem, it was the knowledge that should my arms wear out, I could potentially spend HOURS on the building, just hanging there - either waiting to be saved or to be humiliatingly lowered down. So naturally, I prayed some more and got the heck down all by myself. Immediately I thought, "I am NEVER doing that again." And now, 2 months later - I would COMPLETELY do it again. I know, I'm crazy.
I completed the Alki Beach 5k...I just didn't do it the way it was intended. It ended up being 5k just to get to the starting line, so a few others (who were from out of town and also misinformed) and I walked the 10k together. I have no idea what my finish time was, but it was a beautiful day and I was glad to finish.
The JMM conference in St. Louis was fantastic as always. Lots of fantastic info on mind, mouth, moods, and attitudes. All very helpful and encouraging. Darlene Zschech led worship - it was amazing. All in all, a fantastic trip - lots of fun volunteering - just not much rest! I met a super fun lady from Idaho, she and I shared a few meals and laughs. I'm always thrilled to meet someone new, especially if we've had such different life experiences.
I can't believe it's October!!! I'll definitely try to write more tomorrow.
God Bless!
M
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Skyscrapers and whatnot...
Things are looking up! Mostly, because if I look down this Saturday, I'll probably freeze with fear!
This Saturday, August 14th, I will be rappelling down Rainier Tower in Seattle. It's 514 ft and 41 stories high. Yep, it's true. I think I lost my marbles. The good news about that is, they won't be rolling around in my head making me dizzy while I make my way down. I'm excited, a little terrified, and ready! Kinda really wish I wasn't going it alone, but as with all major things in your life, you often have to go them alone. I've finished 7 races this year alone, so I can do this!
My next 5k is 2.5 weeks out, so I've been training for it. It's a challenge to get up at 545a and run, but I'm making it happen. (HUGE thanks to my pal Anna, who calls me to make sure I'm up. Thank God for her!) For the last few weeks, I've been doing a lot of ab and arm exercises to prep for the rappel. I don't want to be hanging there with an arm cramp, unwilling or unable to move. Yesterday, the doc said I have fantastic muscle mass, so there's that. :)
I've turned a corner. I'm expectant and hopeful, grateful and ready for something great to happen. It's not that I wasn't before, but this huge mind/heart block that was there for a long time is gone now. Dissipating in the least. I'm losing weight and feeling better, eating healthy and spending time reading. A few gal pals and I started a new devotion on eating right and it's really made a huge difference. It's so nice to FEEL good. A few personal victories didn't hurt, either :)
Still wanting to be in Seattle, but the door isn't open just yet. So in the mean time, I'll go for races, events, fun with a wonderful person, and adventure.
It's been a wackadoo year, but certainly memorable. Friends come and go, but God is faithful.
Happy August!
M
This Saturday, August 14th, I will be rappelling down Rainier Tower in Seattle. It's 514 ft and 41 stories high. Yep, it's true. I think I lost my marbles. The good news about that is, they won't be rolling around in my head making me dizzy while I make my way down. I'm excited, a little terrified, and ready! Kinda really wish I wasn't going it alone, but as with all major things in your life, you often have to go them alone. I've finished 7 races this year alone, so I can do this!
My next 5k is 2.5 weeks out, so I've been training for it. It's a challenge to get up at 545a and run, but I'm making it happen. (HUGE thanks to my pal Anna, who calls me to make sure I'm up. Thank God for her!) For the last few weeks, I've been doing a lot of ab and arm exercises to prep for the rappel. I don't want to be hanging there with an arm cramp, unwilling or unable to move. Yesterday, the doc said I have fantastic muscle mass, so there's that. :)
I've turned a corner. I'm expectant and hopeful, grateful and ready for something great to happen. It's not that I wasn't before, but this huge mind/heart block that was there for a long time is gone now. Dissipating in the least. I'm losing weight and feeling better, eating healthy and spending time reading. A few gal pals and I started a new devotion on eating right and it's really made a huge difference. It's so nice to FEEL good. A few personal victories didn't hurt, either :)
Still wanting to be in Seattle, but the door isn't open just yet. So in the mean time, I'll go for races, events, fun with a wonderful person, and adventure.
It's been a wackadoo year, but certainly memorable. Friends come and go, but God is faithful.
Happy August!
M
Monday, June 7, 2010
Oy vey! It's been a while!
Sorry!! I have NOT been faithful at blogging!!
News - I finished my 7th race on Saturday. I bested my PR by 2 minutes/mile. After 4 weeks and 4 races, I'm excited to take a weekend off. *Mind you, I did get online to see if I could find a race for this weekend, but my mind beat my will and I decided to sleep in and clean the house instead!*
I've been looking online for jobs in the Seattle. Oh how my little heart drips caffeine when I think of Seattle. It's been my favorite city since I was little; it's magical with life - it never tires for me - every little piece is a treat...traffic and all. (I know, I know...it wouldn't be that way if I moved there!) I applied for 4 jobs earlier this year and had no luck. This weekend I found 15 more, but for some reason feel like maybe I am supposed to stay put for a while. Ugh. Staying put in Richland. It just doesn't sound like heaven to me...but, since I really feel like that's what God has for me - I'm going to do it with the right attitude. If I want to reap a harvest, I'm going to have to till my fields. Tilling means cleaning out the house, donating a ton of stuff, organizing and down-sizing, taking better care of my body, and working more on my little business. So, until Labor Day - I'm going to Labor away *oh the puns* at my life. I don't want to move to Seattle with a ton of junk that I don't use or need, so it has to go. I'm tired of living with clutter...so I just need to grab the reins and do something about it already!!
I lived through the toughest year of my life (so far). I made it. I survived. Looking back, it doesn't feel like a year. Thinking about my countless trips back and forth to Spokane however, makes me wonder what that year meant. It meant me getting closer to God, it meant me taking better care of myself and challenging myself in ways I wouldn't have imagined before. It meant realizing I was stronger than I thought I was, and it made me see what I really want in this life. I have more hope, I am expecting great things, and I'm ok with the unknown.
I resigned as worship leader at my church. I'd been praying about it for a few months, and God just *popped* open my eyes to a few things and voila! I'm moving on. I am really going to miss the team, I am really going to miss the congregation and the teaching, but I know that God wouldn't be showing me through another door without another amazing blessing just waiting for me :) I'm kind of giddy about what's next! This is exciting!
Things have not turned out how I expected. Life isn't what I had planned or hoped for - but I have absolute trust that it's going to get there!! Kinda crazy...looking back. I think my 6 yr old self would kick me in the shins if she saw me. She'd wonder how the heck I screwed up so badly...but then I'd let her know it's all going to be BETTER than we planned and, not to give away the Cabbage Patch Dolls. :)
So, everything is the same and nothing is the same. I'm still where I was, but I'm not where I used to be. God is good - that never changes. I'm all hopeful and whatnot...and I need coffee!!!
God Bless!
M
Oh, and I PROMISE that next time will be funny!!
News - I finished my 7th race on Saturday. I bested my PR by 2 minutes/mile. After 4 weeks and 4 races, I'm excited to take a weekend off. *Mind you, I did get online to see if I could find a race for this weekend, but my mind beat my will and I decided to sleep in and clean the house instead!*
I've been looking online for jobs in the Seattle. Oh how my little heart drips caffeine when I think of Seattle. It's been my favorite city since I was little; it's magical with life - it never tires for me - every little piece is a treat...traffic and all. (I know, I know...it wouldn't be that way if I moved there!) I applied for 4 jobs earlier this year and had no luck. This weekend I found 15 more, but for some reason feel like maybe I am supposed to stay put for a while. Ugh. Staying put in Richland. It just doesn't sound like heaven to me...but, since I really feel like that's what God has for me - I'm going to do it with the right attitude. If I want to reap a harvest, I'm going to have to till my fields. Tilling means cleaning out the house, donating a ton of stuff, organizing and down-sizing, taking better care of my body, and working more on my little business. So, until Labor Day - I'm going to Labor away *oh the puns* at my life. I don't want to move to Seattle with a ton of junk that I don't use or need, so it has to go. I'm tired of living with clutter...so I just need to grab the reins and do something about it already!!
I lived through the toughest year of my life (so far). I made it. I survived. Looking back, it doesn't feel like a year. Thinking about my countless trips back and forth to Spokane however, makes me wonder what that year meant. It meant me getting closer to God, it meant me taking better care of myself and challenging myself in ways I wouldn't have imagined before. It meant realizing I was stronger than I thought I was, and it made me see what I really want in this life. I have more hope, I am expecting great things, and I'm ok with the unknown.
I resigned as worship leader at my church. I'd been praying about it for a few months, and God just *popped* open my eyes to a few things and voila! I'm moving on. I am really going to miss the team, I am really going to miss the congregation and the teaching, but I know that God wouldn't be showing me through another door without another amazing blessing just waiting for me :) I'm kind of giddy about what's next! This is exciting!
Things have not turned out how I expected. Life isn't what I had planned or hoped for - but I have absolute trust that it's going to get there!! Kinda crazy...looking back. I think my 6 yr old self would kick me in the shins if she saw me. She'd wonder how the heck I screwed up so badly...but then I'd let her know it's all going to be BETTER than we planned and, not to give away the Cabbage Patch Dolls. :)
So, everything is the same and nothing is the same. I'm still where I was, but I'm not where I used to be. God is good - that never changes. I'm all hopeful and whatnot...and I need coffee!!!
God Bless!
M
Oh, and I PROMISE that next time will be funny!!
Monday, April 19, 2010
Allow me to make an introduction...
Yesterday, I finished my 2nd 5k of the year. I finished a minute behind the time I wanted, but considering how ginormous the crowd was at the starting line, I'm pleasantly surprised it wasn't any later than just one minute!
Each and every time I run, I am reminded what an amazing God I serve. If you've read earlier posts, you may remember that I have had chronic asthma since I was 11. I was told I wouldn't run again and may not give birth naturally (or be able to carry a child) because of my asthma. About 2 years ago I was diagnosed with a torn gastroc in my right leg. The specialists were unsure of what to do about it, but one in particular kept encouraging me to see what I could do. He even encouraged me to run (gasp!). So, after a 22 year hiatus from it - I started running; asthma, calf brace, and all.
Yesterday, not only did I finish the 5k - but I did it without an inhaler and without a leg brace. THAT'S HOW BIG MY GOD IS. "You won't run again." Not true. "Your lungs won't ever work right." Not true. "Your leg might not heal, and you could have severe problems walking." Not true. THAT'S HOW BIG MY GOD IS. I'm 3 Finish lines in - and have 11 more planned for the year - and I'm SO excited to see how far this goes!
I do not tire of hearing a race volunteer shout, "Go Runner!" I'm always up for encouraging someone, so when I hear it, I smile and think, "Yeah! Go whoever you are!" and then I realize, "wait, that's me! they're calling ME a runner!" And then I'm reminded again - that what humans say is impossible is NOT impossible with God. Throughout my races, I repeatedly quote Phil 4:13 to myself. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." And I can, and He does.
So - if you haven't met my God - and you want to - allow me to introduce you. It's not always an easy race - but He's faithful to run along side you or to carry you when you can't go any further. He's unfailing, unchanging, and NOTHING is impossible with Him. He's Jesus :)
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:1-2
God bless you!!
M
Each and every time I run, I am reminded what an amazing God I serve. If you've read earlier posts, you may remember that I have had chronic asthma since I was 11. I was told I wouldn't run again and may not give birth naturally (or be able to carry a child) because of my asthma. About 2 years ago I was diagnosed with a torn gastroc in my right leg. The specialists were unsure of what to do about it, but one in particular kept encouraging me to see what I could do. He even encouraged me to run (gasp!). So, after a 22 year hiatus from it - I started running; asthma, calf brace, and all.
Yesterday, not only did I finish the 5k - but I did it without an inhaler and without a leg brace. THAT'S HOW BIG MY GOD IS. "You won't run again." Not true. "Your lungs won't ever work right." Not true. "Your leg might not heal, and you could have severe problems walking." Not true. THAT'S HOW BIG MY GOD IS. I'm 3 Finish lines in - and have 11 more planned for the year - and I'm SO excited to see how far this goes!
I do not tire of hearing a race volunteer shout, "Go Runner!" I'm always up for encouraging someone, so when I hear it, I smile and think, "Yeah! Go whoever you are!" and then I realize, "wait, that's me! they're calling ME a runner!" And then I'm reminded again - that what humans say is impossible is NOT impossible with God. Throughout my races, I repeatedly quote Phil 4:13 to myself. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." And I can, and He does.
So - if you haven't met my God - and you want to - allow me to introduce you. It's not always an easy race - but He's faithful to run along side you or to carry you when you can't go any further. He's unfailing, unchanging, and NOTHING is impossible with Him. He's Jesus :)
"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:1-2
God bless you!!
M
Friday, March 26, 2010
Inspirational quote of the day :)
What's crazy is a) I'm on sparkpeople and I love it. b) I have a motivational collage in my cubicle, and this girl who is running above is also on my collage twice! Someday, I'd like to have the same fit body (only, I'll keep the C's.) :)
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Feeling like Forrest Gump... "I was RUNNING!"
On Sunday, I finished my 1st 1/2 marathon on Mercer Island, WA. I signed up to walk, planning on running to each mile marker as soon as I could see it. My plan worked! I finished in 3 hours and 50 minutes; bloody toes and sore muscles in tact!
For a chronic asthmatic with a torn gastroc, this was a feat!
I am signed up for races every month for the next 7 months - only these will be BETTER prepared for. I walked a lot to prepare for this 1/2 M, but not nearly as much as I needed to.
I've learned a lot about my body and about the sport of running in the last few days. I learned about my strengths, weaknesses, and mostly - I'm very proud of myself. When I ran across the finish line and people were shouting at me, "GO RUNNER!!!!" something inside me had the energy to jump...but my legs didn't cooperate :) It was an amazing experience, and I want to do it again!!!
I gotta make this really clear: I could not have even attempted this without my Savior. As a teenager, doctors told me I wouldn't run, I may not give birth, and I may not live long because of my asthma. A year ago, doctors told me they had no idea what to do about my leg because they hadn't ever seen a muscle do what mine has done. Well, my God is bigger than asthma - and He's bigger than a torn muscle. Nothing is impossible with Him. I ran with Philippians 4:13 streaming through my brain. "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me." And it's true.
When I crossed that finish line, something changed in me. I'm a new creation. My faith is strengthened, my outlook is renewed, and my hope is refreshed. I'm praising God for what He has done!!!
God Bless,
M
For a chronic asthmatic with a torn gastroc, this was a feat!
I am signed up for races every month for the next 7 months - only these will be BETTER prepared for. I walked a lot to prepare for this 1/2 M, but not nearly as much as I needed to.
I've learned a lot about my body and about the sport of running in the last few days. I learned about my strengths, weaknesses, and mostly - I'm very proud of myself. When I ran across the finish line and people were shouting at me, "GO RUNNER!!!!" something inside me had the energy to jump...but my legs didn't cooperate :) It was an amazing experience, and I want to do it again!!!
I gotta make this really clear: I could not have even attempted this without my Savior. As a teenager, doctors told me I wouldn't run, I may not give birth, and I may not live long because of my asthma. A year ago, doctors told me they had no idea what to do about my leg because they hadn't ever seen a muscle do what mine has done. Well, my God is bigger than asthma - and He's bigger than a torn muscle. Nothing is impossible with Him. I ran with Philippians 4:13 streaming through my brain. "I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me." And it's true.
When I crossed that finish line, something changed in me. I'm a new creation. My faith is strengthened, my outlook is renewed, and my hope is refreshed. I'm praising God for what He has done!!!
God Bless,
M
Friday, March 19, 2010
12 years ago today...
On March 19, 1998 in tears, I got on a plane in Seattle, WA and landed a day later in London, England. For 9 months I was privileged to work with some of England's most amazing inhabitants. I spent a while in Glasgow, Scotland before being transferred to the Lake District, London, and back to the Lake District. The memories of that life-changing adventure will stay with me for a lifetime.
I experienced an amazing and passionate love like I had never known, the greatest and most unexpected loss of my young life, and that no matter who you are or what hand you have been dealt - you need to live your life to the fullest.
I paid homage at Shakespeare's birthplace, walked on ancestral soil in Ireland, held a little lamb, toured all of London's theatres & marketplaces, wound through tube stops, marveled at castles, snuck through passageways at the Tower of London, dreamt my way through the West End, led a group of tourists through Covent Garden, prayed in the Bath Abbey, sang in the York Minster, and drank my weight in tea.
I climbed rock faces, sped across gorgeous lakes in canoes, spelunked in deep caverns, hiked rolling green fells, floated through fields of daffodils, frolicked on the top of a cliff, and changed my outlook forever.
I found out what it meant to take care of someone who relied on you completely, to let go of inhibitions that make your stomach weak and your heart break, and how strong I really am.
One of my most treasured life experiences - here's to an amazing 9 months. Rex, Bedie, Arah, Jane, Jeff, Anna, Matt, Dawn, Marion, Eileen, Sue, Jo, Scott, JP, Ellie, Tina, Rose, Nick, and many more...John, and the one who we haven't met yet - I love and treasure thoughts and memories of you more than I can say.
God Bless,
M
I experienced an amazing and passionate love like I had never known, the greatest and most unexpected loss of my young life, and that no matter who you are or what hand you have been dealt - you need to live your life to the fullest.
I paid homage at Shakespeare's birthplace, walked on ancestral soil in Ireland, held a little lamb, toured all of London's theatres & marketplaces, wound through tube stops, marveled at castles, snuck through passageways at the Tower of London, dreamt my way through the West End, led a group of tourists through Covent Garden, prayed in the Bath Abbey, sang in the York Minster, and drank my weight in tea.
I climbed rock faces, sped across gorgeous lakes in canoes, spelunked in deep caverns, hiked rolling green fells, floated through fields of daffodils, frolicked on the top of a cliff, and changed my outlook forever.
I found out what it meant to take care of someone who relied on you completely, to let go of inhibitions that make your stomach weak and your heart break, and how strong I really am.
One of my most treasured life experiences - here's to an amazing 9 months. Rex, Bedie, Arah, Jane, Jeff, Anna, Matt, Dawn, Marion, Eileen, Sue, Jo, Scott, JP, Ellie, Tina, Rose, Nick, and many more...John, and the one who we haven't met yet - I love and treasure thoughts and memories of you more than I can say.
God Bless,
M
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
One of my favorite days!
Oh it's St. Patrick's Day!!! One of my favorite days of the year; 2nd only to Easter! I get decked out from head to toe; shamrock head band, buttons, necklaces, coat, shirt, socks, the works. I even bring extra flair in case someone forgot...and of course, Crab gets decked out too. (I'll have to post a pic!)
The half marathon is this weekend - and I am simply not ready. I WILL be ready for the Race for the Cure in Spokane on the 18th next month, and for the Rhody Run in Port Townsend on the 16th of May. This out of shape garbage has got to stop! I'm positive that I'll finish on Sunday, I just hope my leg and asthma are as sweet to me as I am to them!!
I went to a Passover Seder service last night. It was educational and emotional, historical and unforgettable. The horseradish portion of the supper, which represents the bitterness of the Jews' time in Egypt, was life-threatening! I've never heard so many people hack and cough in unison before. Some likened it to an above-ground drowning. It was awful; and aptly representative of the bitter time in Egypt. The speaker said something that I'm hearing ALL THE TIME; "Let me tell you this as a Jew, that when God tells you to do something, you do it - no matter what!" Yes Lord, I realize that you are beating this message into my head. I get it. I'm waiting. I got it. Hardest bloody time of my life; but God has not left His throne :)
I'm ready to get out of town this weekend. There's just no place like Seattle. You can't beat the ocean air, the mountain views, the unbeatable coffee, the unique boutiques, the open markets, the Asian superstores, and more. I just absolutely love it.
Here's the verse that I just can't shake lately: "Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked." Ps 84:10 Hoping anyone who reads this has a wonderful day :)
God Bless,
M
The half marathon is this weekend - and I am simply not ready. I WILL be ready for the Race for the Cure in Spokane on the 18th next month, and for the Rhody Run in Port Townsend on the 16th of May. This out of shape garbage has got to stop! I'm positive that I'll finish on Sunday, I just hope my leg and asthma are as sweet to me as I am to them!!
I went to a Passover Seder service last night. It was educational and emotional, historical and unforgettable. The horseradish portion of the supper, which represents the bitterness of the Jews' time in Egypt, was life-threatening! I've never heard so many people hack and cough in unison before. Some likened it to an above-ground drowning. It was awful; and aptly representative of the bitter time in Egypt. The speaker said something that I'm hearing ALL THE TIME; "Let me tell you this as a Jew, that when God tells you to do something, you do it - no matter what!" Yes Lord, I realize that you are beating this message into my head. I get it. I'm waiting. I got it. Hardest bloody time of my life; but God has not left His throne :)
I'm ready to get out of town this weekend. There's just no place like Seattle. You can't beat the ocean air, the mountain views, the unbeatable coffee, the unique boutiques, the open markets, the Asian superstores, and more. I just absolutely love it.
Here's the verse that I just can't shake lately: "Better is one day in your courts than a thousand elsewhere; I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God than dwell in the tents of the wicked." Ps 84:10 Hoping anyone who reads this has a wonderful day :)
God Bless,
M
Monday, March 8, 2010
There are changes afoot...
I'm gearing up for my first half marathon. On the one hand, I'm SUPER stoked about this adventure. To say I've completed it will be 100% fantastic. I am kicking myself for not having prepared more than I have...but am committed to getting in some great workouts in the next two weeks so the 13.1 miles don't (sing it, Berlin) take my breath away. I've got another in November, and if I can jog half of that, I'll be THRILLED with myself, and possibly treat myself to an international excursion.
I left the Zambia Missions team. It was a heartbreaking decision, but in the end, I knew that it was the right decision. I have peace about it, and I know God has something AMAZING in the works for me. Already, there are missions opportunities in Haiti for May, and in East Asia for November. Anywhere I could be a blessing is where I want to be.
My friend Jill got me a Bed, Bath, and Beyond gift certificate for my birthday...if you haven't been in that store, and try to go in without having the slightest clue what to get - it can steal HOURS from your life. Now, since my work pal Vicki went on and on about a wine aerator, I KNEW what I had to get at B, B, & B. So, last night I tried it, and it forever changed how I will drink wine. After opening the bottle, I poured a few ounces with out the aerator, and then a few with...and the difference was incredible. An inexpensive bottle became a lot more flavorful with a once-through of the aerator. What first tasted like a mouth of acidic, bright floral notes (with a spark that compares to 7-up) became a smooth, flavor-filled mouthful of wine-y goodness! You gotta try it! (And, thank you Jill!)
I am working on not complaining. Now, most Christians would say that yes, we have so much to be joyful about that avoiding a complaint now and then should be easy. But it is a challenge! I'm giving it my best shot...and right now, my self-grade would be a C+. I can do better than this...and if you are reading this - then I challenge you to do the same. I'm trying to (sing it Johnny Mercer) accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative.
After spending a lot of time around crafty people this weekend, I've decided I want to do more with my small business. The photos are better than I thought they were, and I've got a lot of great ideas that might actually make some money - and enrich people's lives at the same time! I'm adding frames, emergency (treat) travel kits, and wine tasting party kits to the mix...I hope it's all as wonderful as I think it is :)
Things are looking up. I serve a God who reminds me to praise Him in spite of my circumstances - to wait on Him no matter how hard the winds blow or how heavy the clouds rain down. "Thou O Lord, are a shield about me, You're my glory and the lifter of my head." Psalm 3:3 I'm waiting, and I'll worship while I'm waiting. I'm not done.
God Bless you!
If you pray: please lift up my friend Shiy - she needs a miracle!!! We're standing together, believing God will heal and remove any cancer in her system.
I left the Zambia Missions team. It was a heartbreaking decision, but in the end, I knew that it was the right decision. I have peace about it, and I know God has something AMAZING in the works for me. Already, there are missions opportunities in Haiti for May, and in East Asia for November. Anywhere I could be a blessing is where I want to be.
My friend Jill got me a Bed, Bath, and Beyond gift certificate for my birthday...if you haven't been in that store, and try to go in without having the slightest clue what to get - it can steal HOURS from your life. Now, since my work pal Vicki went on and on about a wine aerator, I KNEW what I had to get at B, B, & B. So, last night I tried it, and it forever changed how I will drink wine. After opening the bottle, I poured a few ounces with out the aerator, and then a few with...and the difference was incredible. An inexpensive bottle became a lot more flavorful with a once-through of the aerator. What first tasted like a mouth of acidic, bright floral notes (with a spark that compares to 7-up) became a smooth, flavor-filled mouthful of wine-y goodness! You gotta try it! (And, thank you Jill!)
I am working on not complaining. Now, most Christians would say that yes, we have so much to be joyful about that avoiding a complaint now and then should be easy. But it is a challenge! I'm giving it my best shot...and right now, my self-grade would be a C+. I can do better than this...and if you are reading this - then I challenge you to do the same. I'm trying to (sing it Johnny Mercer) accentuate the positive and eliminate the negative.
After spending a lot of time around crafty people this weekend, I've decided I want to do more with my small business. The photos are better than I thought they were, and I've got a lot of great ideas that might actually make some money - and enrich people's lives at the same time! I'm adding frames, emergency (treat) travel kits, and wine tasting party kits to the mix...I hope it's all as wonderful as I think it is :)
Things are looking up. I serve a God who reminds me to praise Him in spite of my circumstances - to wait on Him no matter how hard the winds blow or how heavy the clouds rain down. "Thou O Lord, are a shield about me, You're my glory and the lifter of my head." Psalm 3:3 I'm waiting, and I'll worship while I'm waiting. I'm not done.
God Bless you!
If you pray: please lift up my friend Shiy - she needs a miracle!!! We're standing together, believing God will heal and remove any cancer in her system.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Better is one day...
Oh joy of joys, I turned 34 yesterday. 34 - you just have to be kidding me! I thought for sure by now I'd be a tired housewife, with three kids hanging off of her hip. Eh, maybe I'll give it another ten years and I'll be there :) It was a fabulous birthday. I was bombarded with well wishes from facebook pals - I'm not kidding, somewhere in the range of 100+ people wrote me a note - it was overwhelming and fabulous and I loved every minute of it. My mom drove down to surprise me at work - I was a weepy mess.
I really thought yesterday was going to be miserable, but instead, my cup ran over with blessings - and I'm ok with the number, and where my sweet Savior has me right now. It's all in His hands anyway. The next 34 are going to be a wild ride!
"Better is one day in your courts, than a thousand elsewhere." Ps 84:10 That song is STUCK in my head, and I am loving it!
God Bless!
M
I really thought yesterday was going to be miserable, but instead, my cup ran over with blessings - and I'm ok with the number, and where my sweet Savior has me right now. It's all in His hands anyway. The next 34 are going to be a wild ride!
"Better is one day in your courts, than a thousand elsewhere." Ps 84:10 That song is STUCK in my head, and I am loving it!
God Bless!
M
Sunday, January 31, 2010
A light at the end of the tunnel...
Five years ago, I had a falling out with one of the best gals I've ever known. She's the funniest girl I know, and has inspired and encouraged me more times than I can count. Today - this very day - we reunited. We cried and laughed and hugged a lot - I got to hold her baby and tour her beautiful home. I've missed her so much; she was always more like a sister than a friend. And what would I know of sisters? I've never had one. But, she is different. She knows exactly who I am, through and through, and she doesn't judge me. She gets me, and she's honest, and I am so blessed that she's back.
We were talking about what has gone on in the last five years. She has two kids and is now a stay at home mom; I moved and am single. In the midst of one of our conversations, I said, "I know that something amazing is going to happen, nothing is impossible!" and she pointed at her sweet adopted babies and said, "look! I know!" Man that blessed my heart. Faith in action, miracles in front of me.
My birthday is almost here; and I'm not so sure I want to be awake for it. I'm missing someone desperately, holding on to hope and believing that though this aches, something amazing is in the works for me. I'm clinging to Psalm 139, knowing that there are plans for me - and they've been there LONG before I was even here. I serve a mighty and wonderful God, who comforts me and loves me, and holds me in the palm of His hand.
On this day, I'm so grateful for my many blessings; and while part of me aches, the rest of me sings of how grateful I am that He hears me when I call His name - and that NOTHING is too difficult for Him.
God Bless,
M
We were talking about what has gone on in the last five years. She has two kids and is now a stay at home mom; I moved and am single. In the midst of one of our conversations, I said, "I know that something amazing is going to happen, nothing is impossible!" and she pointed at her sweet adopted babies and said, "look! I know!" Man that blessed my heart. Faith in action, miracles in front of me.
My birthday is almost here; and I'm not so sure I want to be awake for it. I'm missing someone desperately, holding on to hope and believing that though this aches, something amazing is in the works for me. I'm clinging to Psalm 139, knowing that there are plans for me - and they've been there LONG before I was even here. I serve a mighty and wonderful God, who comforts me and loves me, and holds me in the palm of His hand.
On this day, I'm so grateful for my many blessings; and while part of me aches, the rest of me sings of how grateful I am that He hears me when I call His name - and that NOTHING is too difficult for Him.
God Bless,
M
Frozen Stuff
I did it. I plunged into freezing cold water. It was for a good cause, so it was worth it - but seriously...it was freezing. The rest of my team was FREAKING out about how cold it was going to be, what their exit strategies would be, etc. I was only focused on getting the heck out of the water. I made this ENORMOUS leap off of the dock and when I hit the water - SHOCK, pure unadulterated shock. The rescue diver that had been standing in the water said calmly, "you're in shock, it's ok. You'll catch your breath, it's cool." I replied, "I'm in shock? Am I not breathing?" Cuz you know, you'd have thought I would've caught on to that. Anywho, I flapped and kicked until I got to the point where I could finally touch bottom, allthewhile thinking, "smile Mary, someone has a camera." Gimme a break self! I was freezing and shocked, I can allow myself a break. Or not. Pulling my soaked, frozen shirt away from my body, I was the 1st one in that group to get OUT of the water. Some genius in the crowd asked, "was it cold?" Hmmm...had he asked others that? Was he serious? numb? in shock? Really guy? Yeesh.
A few coworkers showed up to cheer our team on, and a friend of mine was jumping, so some mutual friends showed up. I was happy to see them after being absent from them for some time, I was grateful for the hugs. Can't say it felt fantastic to not have someone there just for me; someone was missing. I gotta say, I'd much rather go through jumping in that freezing cold water every day, than go through emotional junk every day. At least the water shock wears off, you can change your smelly river clothes, and warm up in a hot shower. The emotional stuff hasn't gotten easier. I have total faith something awesome is going to happen, but some days are harder than others. I'll keep praying, I'll keep hoping for that something fantastic that God has planned for me - I don't know who or when, but I know there's a plan. I'm so grateful that I can rely on His promises and that He'll never forget me - but under that faith, and under part of 'me' is a human who shatters occasionally and can't muster a smile to save her life.
Ugh, that was depressing. But, it was real. So there's that. Someday I'm going to look back on this and think, "Thank God I went through that to get me to where I am. Thank God He saw this victory in store for me."
And oh yes, I marked something off my bucket list today. So far: I visited all things Shakespeare in his hometown, check. I lived in Europe, check. I studied at Cambridge, check. I stood on the stage at the Globe Theatre, check. I found my family roots in Boston (in memory of my precious Grandpa), check. I was published in print *and paid!*, check. I took a road trip on the back of a motorcycle, check. I went on a carriage ride in Central Park w/ an amazing man, check. And today, I did a Polar Plunge - check! On the 14th of February, I get to lead our congregation in a worship song that I wrote - that's gonna be one heckuva check. Later this year - I'm going to Africa, skydiving, and finishing TWO half marathons. (4 checks to come this year!) I'm an especially blessed girl :)
It was a good day, a memorable day, and yes - I have the t-shirt.
"For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11 It's a promise I'm counting on :) God never changes, He never fails. And I'm happy to be His.
A few coworkers showed up to cheer our team on, and a friend of mine was jumping, so some mutual friends showed up. I was happy to see them after being absent from them for some time, I was grateful for the hugs. Can't say it felt fantastic to not have someone there just for me; someone was missing. I gotta say, I'd much rather go through jumping in that freezing cold water every day, than go through emotional junk every day. At least the water shock wears off, you can change your smelly river clothes, and warm up in a hot shower. The emotional stuff hasn't gotten easier. I have total faith something awesome is going to happen, but some days are harder than others. I'll keep praying, I'll keep hoping for that something fantastic that God has planned for me - I don't know who or when, but I know there's a plan. I'm so grateful that I can rely on His promises and that He'll never forget me - but under that faith, and under part of 'me' is a human who shatters occasionally and can't muster a smile to save her life.
Ugh, that was depressing. But, it was real. So there's that. Someday I'm going to look back on this and think, "Thank God I went through that to get me to where I am. Thank God He saw this victory in store for me."
And oh yes, I marked something off my bucket list today. So far: I visited all things Shakespeare in his hometown, check. I lived in Europe, check. I studied at Cambridge, check. I stood on the stage at the Globe Theatre, check. I found my family roots in Boston (in memory of my precious Grandpa), check. I was published in print *and paid!*, check. I took a road trip on the back of a motorcycle, check. I went on a carriage ride in Central Park w/ an amazing man, check. And today, I did a Polar Plunge - check! On the 14th of February, I get to lead our congregation in a worship song that I wrote - that's gonna be one heckuva check. Later this year - I'm going to Africa, skydiving, and finishing TWO half marathons. (4 checks to come this year!) I'm an especially blessed girl :)
It was a good day, a memorable day, and yes - I have the t-shirt.
"For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord. "Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11 It's a promise I'm counting on :) God never changes, He never fails. And I'm happy to be His.
Friday, January 29, 2010
Changing it up
I have been WAY too restricted in my writing...that's it. I'm going whole hog. Ya know, later.
Soldiering On
This week has been a challenging one! On one hand, I received an amazing compliment from a government country manager at work, and was very grateful at how loud she was with it. On the other hand, so many challenges both personally and professionally - I feel the need to pass out for about two days, and just get all the rest I can. However, I don't have time for that, so I'll soldier on.
Tomorrow, I'm participating in the Polar Plunge for Special Olympics. I'm SO grateful that there is no snow on the ground and that I have the potential to not freeze to death. It's probably the only time in my life that I'll do it, so I might as well enjoy it!
Next weekend I'm heading to Bellingham, so hopefully I can pick up a few items for a good weekend travel story. I love the coast, so I'm looking forward to it! Also, I get to see my family - so it's going to be a great trip! Just praying now for a snow-free pass so I can drive safely there and back without any stress!
Hoping for a wonderful weekend, and some time to relax and finish my state business taxes!
Tomorrow, I'm participating in the Polar Plunge for Special Olympics. I'm SO grateful that there is no snow on the ground and that I have the potential to not freeze to death. It's probably the only time in my life that I'll do it, so I might as well enjoy it!
Next weekend I'm heading to Bellingham, so hopefully I can pick up a few items for a good weekend travel story. I love the coast, so I'm looking forward to it! Also, I get to see my family - so it's going to be a great trip! Just praying now for a snow-free pass so I can drive safely there and back without any stress!
Hoping for a wonderful weekend, and some time to relax and finish my state business taxes!
Monday, January 18, 2010
Calories, Colds, a Treadmill, and Thanskgiving
Our company is competing in a "Biggest Loser" weight-off. I kind of spear-headed it, with the full intention or winning. And, the truth is, it's completely do-able. I have enough weight to lose to make a difference, but not so much that I'd be sick if I lost it. This morning, the big boss weighed in, and he's beating me!!! Oy vey, my weekend of 2000 calories a day may end up biting me, so I'll have to step it up. The hard part is this silly cold thing...I need to learn to burn calories while I blow my nose :) The work week is no problem, it's the weekEND that needs more self control.
I walked about 3 miles yesterday; I would've liked to have walked a lot more than that, but with the cold, I didn't see the need to completely drain myself. I'm hoping to take it up to 5 miles today - I just need to make myself do it. If I intend to finish the half marathon in March, it's going to take some serious effort - and I can do it, I just need to get in the right mindset. Once I finish it, I think I'll be in better headspace to actually jog the half marathon in November. For 2011, I'll go for the entire marathon!
Anywho, I'm blessed today as I'm reminded about the goodness of God. He makes all things new; so even when things look murky, I have the blessed assurance that it won't be murky for long. There's a song that goes: "Sometimes He calms the storm, and other times He calms His child." I think for the last 8 months or so, He's just calmed me, and so long as He's there, the storms can come. I have no idea what He has planned for me, but I'm looking forward to it with excitement and thanksgiving, that He loves me and knows the desires of my heart. His plan is so much better than anything I could dream of, so I wait for it with abounding hope.
God Bless!
M
I walked about 3 miles yesterday; I would've liked to have walked a lot more than that, but with the cold, I didn't see the need to completely drain myself. I'm hoping to take it up to 5 miles today - I just need to make myself do it. If I intend to finish the half marathon in March, it's going to take some serious effort - and I can do it, I just need to get in the right mindset. Once I finish it, I think I'll be in better headspace to actually jog the half marathon in November. For 2011, I'll go for the entire marathon!
Anywho, I'm blessed today as I'm reminded about the goodness of God. He makes all things new; so even when things look murky, I have the blessed assurance that it won't be murky for long. There's a song that goes: "Sometimes He calms the storm, and other times He calms His child." I think for the last 8 months or so, He's just calmed me, and so long as He's there, the storms can come. I have no idea what He has planned for me, but I'm looking forward to it with excitement and thanksgiving, that He loves me and knows the desires of my heart. His plan is so much better than anything I could dream of, so I wait for it with abounding hope.
God Bless!
M
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Two 3 year old Blessings :)
At our first Zambia missions meeting this Sunday, everyone kept mentioning their sponsored children in Zambia. I had no idea that everyone was hoping to meet their sponsored children. How exciting! So...I went onto the World Vision website and prayed about what I should do; how many, if any should I commit to sponsoring? I looked yesterday and prayerfully considered it last night. God hasn't blessed me with children yet, so the very least I can do is try to bless others' children.
My first instinct was to sponsor just one child, and for some reason, my heart was set on a little girl. So, today, I went online and picked a little girl (let me tell you how gut wrenching that decision was, if I had the money, I would've sponsored them all.) Her name is Agness and she is 3. She lives in a village completely affected by the HIV/AIDS epidemic. Her health is unsatisfactory, but she loves to jump :) I am in love with her sweet little face, and God willing, I'll meet her in April.
After sharing my joyful news with a few coworkers, I felt a strong tugging to sponsor one more child. I prayed, and asked 'if the money is there, I'll do it.' So, I got out the calculator, and did the math about the little raise I just got...it was .26 more than I needed to sponsor two children every month...so I went back into the World Vision site and found another 3 year old, this time a happy little man (complete with tie) named Saviour. He lives in the same area as Agness. He loves football and helps with washing the dishes. I gotta say, I haven't even met them, and it's only been hours since I committed to sponsoring them, but I am elated about this. I picked little ones so I could hopefully watch them grow into healthy little people. I will be blessed beyond measure if I can meet both of them in April.
In the diet news: I'm doing well, eating healthy, and somehow even lost weight despite my food frenzy in Cleveland. I'm going to work out lightly tonight, seeing as the airplane cold I caught is still taking residence in my lungs.
I made a decision to stop wasting food this year. I'm going to try to stop frivolous spending, and focus more on giving to those who don't have as much as I do. Until February 6th, I'm not purchasing coffee, treats, soda, etc. I'll eat what's in my house, but not spoil myself with additional things that only lead to gluttony and laziness. It's important that we do all we can for those who don't have as much as we do - so I'm going to walk it out.
God has blessed me with a good job, a nice place to live, warm clothes, and a loving group of family and friends. I'm overwhelmed by my blessings and His goodness. If you read this, I encourage you to take action too. I chose http://www.worldvision.org/ - maybe you will, too!
God Bless!
M
My first instinct was to sponsor just one child, and for some reason, my heart was set on a little girl. So, today, I went online and picked a little girl (let me tell you how gut wrenching that decision was, if I had the money, I would've sponsored them all.) Her name is Agness and she is 3. She lives in a village completely affected by the HIV/AIDS epidemic. Her health is unsatisfactory, but she loves to jump :) I am in love with her sweet little face, and God willing, I'll meet her in April.
After sharing my joyful news with a few coworkers, I felt a strong tugging to sponsor one more child. I prayed, and asked 'if the money is there, I'll do it.' So, I got out the calculator, and did the math about the little raise I just got...it was .26 more than I needed to sponsor two children every month...so I went back into the World Vision site and found another 3 year old, this time a happy little man (complete with tie) named Saviour. He lives in the same area as Agness. He loves football and helps with washing the dishes. I gotta say, I haven't even met them, and it's only been hours since I committed to sponsoring them, but I am elated about this. I picked little ones so I could hopefully watch them grow into healthy little people. I will be blessed beyond measure if I can meet both of them in April.
In the diet news: I'm doing well, eating healthy, and somehow even lost weight despite my food frenzy in Cleveland. I'm going to work out lightly tonight, seeing as the airplane cold I caught is still taking residence in my lungs.
I made a decision to stop wasting food this year. I'm going to try to stop frivolous spending, and focus more on giving to those who don't have as much as I do. Until February 6th, I'm not purchasing coffee, treats, soda, etc. I'll eat what's in my house, but not spoil myself with additional things that only lead to gluttony and laziness. It's important that we do all we can for those who don't have as much as we do - so I'm going to walk it out.
God has blessed me with a good job, a nice place to live, warm clothes, and a loving group of family and friends. I'm overwhelmed by my blessings and His goodness. If you read this, I encourage you to take action too. I chose http://www.worldvision.org/ - maybe you will, too!
God Bless!
M
Saturday, January 9, 2010
New Challenges
Just before the end of the year, I registered for a half marathon. It's not until November, but it's already got my blood pumping. I'm NOT in shape for this, so I'm so very grateful that I have 11 months to prepare myself for it! I also started a Biggest Loser competition at work this week, and then promptly left for Cleveland on a business trip, and proceded to eat AWFUL, HIGH CALORIE food all week. Oh yes, this is fantastic progress already. Excuse me while I purchase stock in dexatrim and exlax...NOT going according to plan, but this will all change tomorrow!
So, before I will set foot on the half marathon course, I plan to run a 3.75 mile dash in Seattle, a 5k in April in Spokane, Bloomsday in Spokane in May, then another half marathon in the Pac NW along with another 5k before the official half M in November. Like the true academic nerd I am, I even bought a book, "The Idiots Guide to Running"...oh yeah, you can say it. NERD! Considering I'm a chronic asthmatic with a bum leg, I'm beyond excited to see how this goes. I know that God is bigger than asthma, and He's bigger than a torn muscle, so while I'm being smart not to hurt myself or cause an attack, I am excited about what is going to happen this year.
This year I'm trying to keep better track of what I'm praying for and how it's answered. A friend of mine from high school is going through what seems to be the roughest time of her life. She could lose her marriage and both of her children...as a single girl who longs for a future husband and children, I wonder; is it better to not have those things, than to finally get them and then struggle with the possibility of losing them? She's constantly on my mind and always in my prayers. I know that God has a wonderful plan for her and that He holds her in the palm of His hand, so I hand it over to Him instead of worrying about it. His word promises us that "He who began a good work in you is faithful to complete it." Rom 8:28, so I stand on that promise and will continue to hold her up and encourage her any way I can. It's heart wrenching, knowing I can't do anything to take the hurt away. The AMAZING news is, I know the one who can.
I'm hoping to go on the missions trip to Zambia in April. It would be a dream come true, and an amazing opportunity to reach people who otherwise, may not ever receive the help they need. We're told in the NT to "go ye therefore into all the world", so I hope that despite my status as a non-church member, I will be able to go. What an opportunity, to cuddle orphans and help provide them with fresh, clean water...in abundant supply! I'd LOVE to hit all 7 continents for Christ this decade. I think it's do-able...it's HUGE, but not impossible :)
I want to make a difference this year, I want to help change the world in this decade. I want to lead a healthy, happy life - I want to be an example by complaining less and encouraging more; by being more grateful and by trying to make a change for the good. I serve an AMAZING God, NOTHING is impossible for Him, NOTHING is too difficult for Him - and so long as I put Him first, then He'll see to the desires of my heart and direct my path. It's pretty darn intense when you think about it.
Here's to a New Year, a New Decade, and a New outlook.
God Bless!!
M
So, before I will set foot on the half marathon course, I plan to run a 3.75 mile dash in Seattle, a 5k in April in Spokane, Bloomsday in Spokane in May, then another half marathon in the Pac NW along with another 5k before the official half M in November. Like the true academic nerd I am, I even bought a book, "The Idiots Guide to Running"...oh yeah, you can say it. NERD! Considering I'm a chronic asthmatic with a bum leg, I'm beyond excited to see how this goes. I know that God is bigger than asthma, and He's bigger than a torn muscle, so while I'm being smart not to hurt myself or cause an attack, I am excited about what is going to happen this year.
This year I'm trying to keep better track of what I'm praying for and how it's answered. A friend of mine from high school is going through what seems to be the roughest time of her life. She could lose her marriage and both of her children...as a single girl who longs for a future husband and children, I wonder; is it better to not have those things, than to finally get them and then struggle with the possibility of losing them? She's constantly on my mind and always in my prayers. I know that God has a wonderful plan for her and that He holds her in the palm of His hand, so I hand it over to Him instead of worrying about it. His word promises us that "He who began a good work in you is faithful to complete it." Rom 8:28, so I stand on that promise and will continue to hold her up and encourage her any way I can. It's heart wrenching, knowing I can't do anything to take the hurt away. The AMAZING news is, I know the one who can.
I'm hoping to go on the missions trip to Zambia in April. It would be a dream come true, and an amazing opportunity to reach people who otherwise, may not ever receive the help they need. We're told in the NT to "go ye therefore into all the world", so I hope that despite my status as a non-church member, I will be able to go. What an opportunity, to cuddle orphans and help provide them with fresh, clean water...in abundant supply! I'd LOVE to hit all 7 continents for Christ this decade. I think it's do-able...it's HUGE, but not impossible :)
I want to make a difference this year, I want to help change the world in this decade. I want to lead a healthy, happy life - I want to be an example by complaining less and encouraging more; by being more grateful and by trying to make a change for the good. I serve an AMAZING God, NOTHING is impossible for Him, NOTHING is too difficult for Him - and so long as I put Him first, then He'll see to the desires of my heart and direct my path. It's pretty darn intense when you think about it.
Here's to a New Year, a New Decade, and a New outlook.
God Bless!!
M
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